Assessment ~Pa-thet-ic.
The new Hollywood musical with the intriguing title "La-La-Land one of the most talked about motion pictures
in recent years with two of Hollywood's most attractive and popular younger generation stars, Ryan Gosling
and Emma Stone, can best be summed up in a single three syllable word ~~.
PA-THET--IC!
-- Gosling, in spite of a name that makes one think of chopped goose liver, is indeed quite handsome in the
traditional Hollywood leading man mold, but when it comes to acting or personality he is no Cary Grant or
Jimmy Dean, and as far as dancing goes he couldn't carry the jock strap of either Gene Kelly or Fred Astaire.
His love interest and dancing partner, Emma Stone, a lissome (skinny) redhead with gigantic blue eyes, and no
breasts to speak of, is a much better dancer and generally a far better actor, but seems to have aged
considerably since her extraordinarily vivid interpretation of a sexy young college co-ed in love with her
murderous philosophy prof in Woody Allen's "Irrational Man" -- and that just two years ago.
In this picture she is in facial closeup much of the time but looks haggard, worn, wan, and older than she is
supposed to be according to the story. The dance numbers seem to be an attempt at a homage to Astaire and
Ginger Rogers in retarded motion, but they are so badly staged and choreographed that after a while they just
become annoying.
One particular Gosling~Stone duet set in the L.A. Planetarium is so ridiculous -- with the two traipsing in
defiance of the Law of Gravity on thin air against a galaxy of stars -- that it is downright embarrassing.
The young lovers are clearly meant for. each other but their divergent career dreams and aspirations -- she as
an actress he as a Charley Parker inspired serious jazz musician -- keep them apart in the wake of arbitrary
script manipulations that seem so phony you get the feeling the actors had to keep asking themselves, "Hold
on a sec --what were we supposed to be doing in that last scene?"
Pathetic scripting, pathetic unmotivated dance scenes arbitrarily inserted, then ineptly executed -- pathetic
unfocused direction - no wonder Mia (Stone) and Sebastian (Gosling) have such strained expressions on their
pretty faces all the time. I actually felt sorry for Emma in some scenes suspecting that she may have actually
been physically unwell while going through her motions.
I kept looking at my watch wondering if this thing was ever going to end. The running time was 128 minutes
but it felt more like five hours. The end credits with handsome art-deco lettering were a great relief when they
finally came up and put this picture out if its misery. No more Damien Chazelle for me. He also directed
another piece of sado-masochistic indulgence entitled "Whiplash". Give me Mondo Cane ...
Bottom line: A film almost as dopey as its dumbbell La-dee-da title.
And if it cleaned up at the Golden Globes it only means that maintaining membership in the Hollywood Foreign
Press Club Is more important than understanding what the quality of films is all about.
Ryan and Emma traipsing the light fantastic in Griffith Park.
An unfounded rumor has it that Chazelle is planning a remake of
Rebel Without a Pause starring Ryan as Dean and Emma as Natalie
Wood with J.K. Simmons as Plato (Sal Mineo).